The joy (and etiquette) of mixed doubles

Some tips for keeping mixed doubles fun - and sporting...

By Lizzie Flint and Andrew Nixon

In sport you rarely see men and women directly competing against each other. But tennis gives us mixed doubles, which has a very distinctive vibe. Even at Wimbledon you can feel that different atmosphere. Of course it’s competitive – they’re professionals after all – but the players compete in a slightly different way: it can be more fun-filled, relaxed, even a bit flirty. There’s often a lot of laughter in the crowd, and on the court. 

Mixed doubles is tremendously popular in tennis clubs, and is a huge amount of fun. Or it should be… but it does raise different questions to competitive mens or womens doubles. There’s a reason the two genders don’t compete against each other most of the time: mainly, the obvious disparities in physical strength (which goes for all sports, not just tennis). Mixed doubles brings these disparities onto the same court, and I often get asked interesting questions about things like etiquette and what’s socially or sportingly acceptable.

BUT - this isn’t just a gender thing! The tips below can apply to any combination of players if there’s a bit of diversity in terms of ability or physicality. The women might be stronger players than the men. Or there might be generational gaps between players, or kids playing with adults in a family, or a late stand-in might not be quite up to the level of the other three. 

But for shorthand, and because it’s the most common thing that comes up, I’m going to talk about men and women in this post. Here are some of the questions I get asked as a coach...


Is it ok for a man to be as aggressive in mixed doubles as in men’s doubles? 

For example, is it ok to whack a ball straight at a woman when she’s at the net? 

My answer is that it depends. If it’s a tight, competitive match between players of similar ability with a key point on the line, then go for it.

But if you’re well ahead, or if there’s a significant gap in ability, maybe rein it in a bit. You want to stay friends, you want everyone to have a good time... It’s meant to be fun!

Use common sense and be reasonable and sporting. But be careful not to make your ‘reining in’ too obvious. If you’re always hitting the ball full pace to the stronger player and half pace to the weaker as it can seem horribly patronising . So you need to be subtle and work out the balance...


Can a man hit his fastest first serve at a woman? 

Yes! I would say go for it. First of all, the receiver is at a much greater distance from you so they have plenty of time to react. Second, you’re not generally aiming at them, as you might with a shot at the net. Third, it’s a compliment rather than an insult to hit your best serve at an opponent.

And remember you’re only serving one in four games, and only half of them to that player. And unless you have an amazing first serve percentage, they’ll be dealing with your second serve a lot of the time anyway.


Can you take full advantage of a weaker serve and keep smashing winning returns? 

This is a bit more subtle. The physical danger element isn’t there (compared to the body/face shot to the net) so it’s ok to give a good whack. 

But again, it’s dependent on the context of the match and the ability levels of the players. If you find you can easily kill every service point with your return, there’s probably not going to be much fun for anyone if you’re too ruthless. But in a competitive match, go for it.


Can a woman complain if a man is being unnecessarily aggressive with their game? 

This is a tricky one. I would say in general, not really. You can’t normally say much in the game as your opponent is entitled to play however they like within the rules of the sport. But if they’re consistently ruining your fun, just get through the match and then cross them off the list of people you play with.

In the meantime, there are things you can do to make life more comfortable when playing a physically stronger opponent who is targeting you. Remember, there’s nothing in the rules that says one of you has to stand at the net –  you can start wherever you like! So try standing on the baseline, and perhaps let your partner come forward. Another tip: at the end of a set you can change the sides you receive on – perhaps you’ll make a few more returns from the forehand, for example. And you can change the order of server to get a stronger start to the set (and possibly have fewer service games yourself).

But whatever you do, it’s not advisable to try to take revenge (e.g. asking your male partner to start targeting your female opponent in the same way!). You don’t want to get a reputation for bad sportsmanship.

So that’s the etiquette. Now here are some tips for enjoying your mixed doubles to the full...


Eight ways to keep mixed doubles fun

(Most of these apply equally to all forms of doubles)

1) Always communicate on the court. Whether it’s tactics or just chinwagging...but always keep encouraging each other.

2) Don’t show annoyance or negative emotions with your partner if they mess up. We all make mistakes, and you’ll probably just knock their confidence and make matters worse.

3) Stop saying sorry every time you make a mistake. This can get pretty boring!

4) Don’t call your partner’s shots out. Leave that to the opposition, remember whose side you’re on!

5) ….But do feel free to call your opponent’s serves out when your partner is receiving. You might have a better view of the service line than them.

6) Feel free to vary your positions on the court. You don’t need to always start in the traditional doubles format with one up and one back, so if one of you enjoys being at the net much more than the other, try serve-and-volleys and other innovations.

7) Feel free to change the scoring format. To change the dynamic of a match you might like to try sudden-death deuce point (receiver chooses which side it’s started from) or the Fast4 format (set of first to four games, tie-break at 3-3) if you want to.

8) Mix up your partners. Perhaps don’t just play with your husband or wife every week! Mixed doubles is a fabulous way of socialising, so get mixing!


Lizzie Flint is a writer and a practicing level 3 LTA professional tennis coach.

She has been in love with the game since picking up a racquet at the age of four – and she has seen it from every possible angle: playing, analysing and reporting on tennis all over the world. Read more about Lizzie here.

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